Toss and Catch
Look at the way she hangs in the sky above him,
a buoyant point tossed and suspended atop the sturdy
upward stretch of his torso, a small rain of sea
trickling from her wet baby body and polka-dotted swimsuit.
Her joy is unmistakable. The concentration of her father
as he waits to catch her before she hits the water—palpable,
though you can barely make out his face. Waist deep
in a muddy sea, his reflection is a blur on the surface.
Also missing from this picture is my own salt-
stung heart, am best left behind
the lens to capture these fragments and cling to them
like a life raft, later print, frame and arrange them to
remind me that happiness does, in fact, have its place in our life together.
What you focus on will grow itself into perspective, they say.
Like how, behind them, the day is a striking, clear blue, save
a few clouds that mottle the sky. See how a bird flies towards them?
But then what do you make of the pier, or rather, what’s left of it, how it
spikes out of the water in the distance? And the horizon line—
even the horizon line is slightly crooked. I did not shoot
the image that came later, the one where his grip
on her slips. Where she goes under, swallows the sea,
baptized into the reality that every moment of joy
has its counterpoint. She cried some, but soon enough,
our girl is airborne again, and though her small hands
don’t quite let go of his wrists, she lets herself be thrown,
be caught, continues to love the shimmering throttle
as she tumbles through air, gravity repeatedly pulling her back
towards his arms, which stay open and ready, wait to catch her
and everything in her life that goes with it, which, despite my perpetual bent
towards longing and loneliness, I learn, will always include me.
February 24, 2010 at 12:15 pm
Beautiful!! I am so looking forward to having my little girl in my arms..
love and light!
February 24, 2010 at 12:51 pm
Beautiful Cricket!
March 3, 2010 at 11:51 pm
Such evocative moment captured in your words and lens. Thank you for sharing it.
April 13, 2010 at 12:09 pm
I love you’re writing. I’m leading a positive psychotherapy group right now, which includes psychoeducation about savoring. I thought, this is a great example of the effects of savoring…I might share it with the group.
Love you!
January 25, 2011 at 4:03 pm
You do know what you’re doing, so keep at it.
Thank you!
David.
March 18, 2011 at 11:22 am
I’m so sad that you didn’t continue with your blog..I loved it
March 18, 2011 at 6:15 pm
thank you. I miss it very much… time is so precious these days. and you, you have had your baby! congratulations! : )
maybe i will start again. there is so much i have to write about… i just need the time and the discipline (every writer’s dilemma, but especially a writer with two small children). thank you for the encouragement and kind words. love to you and your baby xo
March 18, 2011 at 6:22 pm
Yes of course.. I understand, lord only knows where I find the time to write with my little one and another one on the way (!!) so I too may be taking a break from my blog.
I look forward to reading about your life with the two little ‘uns and more importantly seeking advice on how to cope with a toddler and newborn, yikes. By the by, were you right…was it another girl?
March 18, 2011 at 6:26 pm
yes! : ) Taavi was born May 15, 3 weeks early to the day (making it safe for her to come, and quite pleasing me in the process as i was READY. even my eyelids were getting fat, lol).
two for you, too? : )
tell me the name of your blog! and of course, the names of your babe(s) xo
March 18, 2011 at 6:37 pm
Oh wow, congratuations! I LOVE the names, Seava and Taavi…go so well together- just beautiful. My girl is called Maia (one year old) and doc said I’m now having a boy..we like the name Karim/Kareem (not sure yet which spelling) which means loving and giving in Arabic. Very exciting times but also very exhausting times…zzzzz…..this pregnancy is much tougher than the last! 4 months to go before we meet the little man! My blog is http://www.babesmeetchile.blogspot.com
I do hope that soon you will feel more able to write again but of course take all the time you need…, your blog really is wonderful and I just love the way you write. I get totally absorbed; you will definitely have a reader here! All the best and hugs to the girls xx
March 18, 2011 at 6:41 pm
: ) i love those names too! and the meanings…. i was very clear to pick a different, softer name for the second girl (Taavi is a Scandinavian boys name that means beloved, much loved)…. and she is the yin to her sister’s yang. super mellow and easygoing, smiley, happy. thank the stars!
i look forward to reading your blog and yes, i will aim high to get some new posts up there sooner than later. thanks again for the vote of confidence, and may your next birth be filled with ease, peace, love and spaciousness. xo